She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
