Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
