you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
