We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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