In the future we'll all be gay
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize