Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Apparently you make a good broom.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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