i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize