I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
There's a naked man in my car right now.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Randomize
