Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
