Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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