did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He shit in the fireplace
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
