he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
