We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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