I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Do you remember whose house we're in?
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