butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
