Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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