Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
birth control should be required to get into college
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
