i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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