At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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