They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
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