well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
