Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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