i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
