I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
