Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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