can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
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