Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
