life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
