Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
