Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
