): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
