I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize