ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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