She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
