i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
