I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
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