Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
