my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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