Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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