Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
