i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
