So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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