if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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