It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize