Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
