i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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