wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I think a kid would responsible me up
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
