I think i sorta joined a cult last night
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
