My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
