That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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