i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
