i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
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